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[immerwahr.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine asked me to write him some lyrics for songs. He is pretty skilled at three minute pop wonders, which I (to my undying disappointment) am not. I guess he was looking for something different. I'm not sure that what I came up with is suitable for him, and I'm not sure that it is suitable to be called poetry either. Before I pass them on to him I thought I would ask for comments here. I find it hard to release things into the world as I will endlessly refine, fiddle and edit without ever being happy with the finished product. However, I chose as a method one which was used by a poet I was lucky enough to share a writer's group with many years back. He wrote reams of good words and then ruthlessly cut them down to the bone (I was amazed to see a four line poem that I loved be born from two sides of closely written A4). Often the sense of what he was after in the first place was left only for him to see. I kind of liked that idea, and still do. I'll post more over the next few days. Here is the first one. I'll be very glad of comments. Ta.

CATS WITH WINGS

Cats with wings
They exist, you know
In more than doctored photo
They take your tongue in lieu of love
And nail it to their stretching backs
A mouthful of blood produces only red words
Spit spray crimson and every sense blurred

It’s no small thing to own some thing
That only works in theory
Especially if it’s ugly and unnatural
Just stubby limbs and furry
Glued parts of horse and narwhal spike
Will only make the unicorns laugh
However many innocents
Are drawn in to breathe out on dirty glass
Your mermaid is a kewpie doll with bits of pike attached
Look for the join and you’ll see what does not truly fly
Mummers and mountebanks remain hidebound
Not like cats with wings

Be smart enough to take off from the ground
And gravity’s rainbow will bring you safe back down again
Up there somewhere in the layered aether
Cats cloud coloured scrap with nipping fever
Down below a bowl of quicklime and saltpetre
Lesser beasts have no taste for either
Cats with wings